Go Ahead, Make My Day And Call ...
Telephone solicitors these days apparently try to cram a lifetime's worth of calls into one month.
After we got our Tyler telephone set up, the calls started immediately. I registered the number with the Do Not Call Registry - https://www.donotcall.gov/ - but it doesn't go into effect for 31 days, so we're in a fusillade of telemarketing.
I've never understood the point. With the exception of lonely people who like to talk, I can't imagine why anyone would find the calls anything other than seriously annoying.
Prior to the Do Not Call Registry's creation, when the telemarketers were not so desperate and had time to get to their victims, I rather enjoyed an occasional call. There's all kinds of fun to be had with telemarketers.
And I'm doing the same thing now, with the half dozen or so calls we receive every night from, according to the caller identification, the "unknown."
One of my favorites is to just hand the phone to one of the kids, who ask all kinds of goofy questions or just scream into the line, as instructed. Sometimes I'll put on an accent and speak in gibberish:
Solicitor: "Hello, sir! Is this Brian?"
Me: "Gabba da gooby dah blabbahlah?"
Solicitor: "Uh, is this Brian?"
Me: "GABBA BO-BLABBY ARGER BLAH BEE BLABBAH!!!!!!!!! AAAAAHHH!!! AAAAHH!!!"
They usual hang up after a couple of rounds of this.
A friend of mine unleashed a great one. He enthusiastically went along with everything the solicitor said. Finally, the solicitor got curious and asked why my friend was so enthusiastic, to which my friend replied, "BECAUSE I'M SO LONELY, BABY!!!!!!"
My favorite calls come from circulation folks from competing newspapers. They don't know I work for the home team, so I go on and on and on about how the local newspaper is soooooooooo much better than that rag he's promoting.
One hapless solicitor caught me while I was practicing my trumpet, and he got an earful of loudly blasted "Taps."
A couple of nights ago, a conversation when like this:
Solicitor: "Hello! Is this Brian?"
Brian: "Who is this?"
Solicitor: "This is John Forritt!"
Brian: "Well, THIS IS JOHN AGAINST IT!!!!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!"
He hung up.
Alas, I am but an amateur at solicitor harrassment. Solicitor abuse apparently is a popular amusement across the land. See for yourself:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oh4EPcOpSy8&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IzL81IqgoAI
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YB-RbKbKPs0&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qkE1Nbk-wuI&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ni4qnCUzf54&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W9nJ0rpAcqk&feature=related
And here is the grandaddy of them all:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J5z4Vs26-TI&feature=related
After we got our Tyler telephone set up, the calls started immediately. I registered the number with the Do Not Call Registry - https://www.donotcall.gov/ - but it doesn't go into effect for 31 days, so we're in a fusillade of telemarketing.
I've never understood the point. With the exception of lonely people who like to talk, I can't imagine why anyone would find the calls anything other than seriously annoying.
Prior to the Do Not Call Registry's creation, when the telemarketers were not so desperate and had time to get to their victims, I rather enjoyed an occasional call. There's all kinds of fun to be had with telemarketers.
And I'm doing the same thing now, with the half dozen or so calls we receive every night from, according to the caller identification, the "unknown."
One of my favorites is to just hand the phone to one of the kids, who ask all kinds of goofy questions or just scream into the line, as instructed. Sometimes I'll put on an accent and speak in gibberish:
Solicitor: "Hello, sir! Is this Brian?"
Me: "Gabba da gooby dah blabbahlah?"
Solicitor: "Uh, is this Brian?"
Me: "GABBA BO-BLABBY ARGER BLAH BEE BLABBAH!!!!!!!!! AAAAAHHH!!! AAAAHH!!!"
They usual hang up after a couple of rounds of this.
A friend of mine unleashed a great one. He enthusiastically went along with everything the solicitor said. Finally, the solicitor got curious and asked why my friend was so enthusiastic, to which my friend replied, "BECAUSE I'M SO LONELY, BABY!!!!!!"
My favorite calls come from circulation folks from competing newspapers. They don't know I work for the home team, so I go on and on and on about how the local newspaper is soooooooooo much better than that rag he's promoting.
One hapless solicitor caught me while I was practicing my trumpet, and he got an earful of loudly blasted "Taps."
A couple of nights ago, a conversation when like this:
Solicitor: "Hello! Is this Brian?"
Brian: "Who is this?"
Solicitor: "This is John Forritt!"
Brian: "Well, THIS IS JOHN AGAINST IT!!!!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!"
He hung up.
Alas, I am but an amateur at solicitor harrassment. Solicitor abuse apparently is a popular amusement across the land. See for yourself:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oh4EPcOpSy8&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IzL81IqgoAI
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YB-RbKbKPs0&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qkE1Nbk-wuI&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ni4qnCUzf54&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W9nJ0rpAcqk&feature=related
And here is the grandaddy of them all:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J5z4Vs26-TI&feature=related
posted by Brian Pearson at 9:06 AM
1 Comments:
I remember one time my band and I were practicing and we got a call from a telemarketer. Needless to say the caller got an earful of cymbals, distorted guitars and a primal scream.
When I checked to see if he or she was still on the line all I heard was a sweet dial tone. So, whoever has doubted the power of rock 'n' roll may now believe in its power.
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