Swings and Misses
The source of post-Hurricane Rita frustration no longer centers on the long lines at the grocery store, the sluglike traffic and the mountain of logs in the front yard.
It has nothing to do with playing middle man between insurance company and building contractor. Nor does it have to do with long hours at the office. Or FEMA. Or the wait at the gas station. Or those terrible gas prices. Or the fractured fence. Or the holes in the house. Or money flying out of my bank account like roof tiles during Hurricane Rita. Or the kids' stuffy noses. Or the mindless array of loose ends.
No, the primary stress machine for me now is my inability to find a dadblammed Houston Astros hat.
I've been on the hunt for about a week now. The search became a fevered, desperate quest over the weekend, when I and my family scoured grocery, drug and convenience stores, sports specialty shops, Wal Mart and Academy. Twice.
No luck. Sold out. Astros fever has gripped the land.
The only Astros hat I found was an unadjustable one big enough to serve as a shrimp boat net. You'd have to have some kind of melon to fit into that hat.
I've got a lot of hats, but I only wear a couple of them, usually only on weekends. I've got a Kansas City Chiefs hat I won in a bet, and then there's the Texas A&M hat that is unwearable at this time because it adorned my sweaty noggin during the post-Rita swampy days. I might need to put it on and walk through a car wash to knock the stench out of it.
But I need an Astros hat, one of those adjustable blue ones with the star with two sides missing. Someone probably spent $1 million on the design for that eight-sided star. Heck, I'd take one of those old gaudy orange Astros hats with an "H" on the front.
The Astros are down 0-2 to the Chicago White Sox in the World Series, so I need that hat, and the Astros need me to have that hat.
Anyone know where I can get one?
It has nothing to do with playing middle man between insurance company and building contractor. Nor does it have to do with long hours at the office. Or FEMA. Or the wait at the gas station. Or those terrible gas prices. Or the fractured fence. Or the holes in the house. Or money flying out of my bank account like roof tiles during Hurricane Rita. Or the kids' stuffy noses. Or the mindless array of loose ends.
No, the primary stress machine for me now is my inability to find a dadblammed Houston Astros hat.
I've been on the hunt for about a week now. The search became a fevered, desperate quest over the weekend, when I and my family scoured grocery, drug and convenience stores, sports specialty shops, Wal Mart and Academy. Twice.
No luck. Sold out. Astros fever has gripped the land.
The only Astros hat I found was an unadjustable one big enough to serve as a shrimp boat net. You'd have to have some kind of melon to fit into that hat.
I've got a lot of hats, but I only wear a couple of them, usually only on weekends. I've got a Kansas City Chiefs hat I won in a bet, and then there's the Texas A&M hat that is unwearable at this time because it adorned my sweaty noggin during the post-Rita swampy days. I might need to put it on and walk through a car wash to knock the stench out of it.
But I need an Astros hat, one of those adjustable blue ones with the star with two sides missing. Someone probably spent $1 million on the design for that eight-sided star. Heck, I'd take one of those old gaudy orange Astros hats with an "H" on the front.
The Astros are down 0-2 to the Chicago White Sox in the World Series, so I need that hat, and the Astros need me to have that hat.
Anyone know where I can get one?
posted by Brian Pearson at 10:12 AM
1 Comments:
I feel your pain but my daughter brought me a shirt from Dallas or North Dakota (wherever). Hope you find something soon.
Go Astros!
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